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Holding on

to just the hope that you will guide me out of this hell

that you will help me find my way again.

For the darkness of today will not be the darkness of tomorrow

the words flowing from you mouth will not be forgotten today and tomorrow I will still ponder over them.

Holding on for your strength, your love, your protection my lord for no one can provide that for me than you.

You get me through the things that make me want to pull my hair out

You’re the one that makes me stop and think before I say something I may regret

The reason my patience isn’t as thin as it used to be, the reason my truth is out there for all eyes to see.

The reason I am always on alert mode, watching the actions of others and making sure I’m not following in their footsteps.

You’re the reason I breathe another day and wake up being grateful for the people in my life.

The reason I am as quiet as I am for my voice should only be used to cause good and not bring more bad into the world.

I know I am not perfect and that no one is and each day we all go through something and at times we want to be in their shoes for on the outside it all looks so good.

But, yet on the inside things may not be in the place you are when you are just being you, the person you know inside and out.

Shine because he wants you too not because someone else thinks or believes you are more than you are.

You know who has the answers and who doesn’t and maybe one day you will see you as he sees you.

 

Written By: Deirdre Stokes

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I’ve said

my peace and now it’s time for you to let me go. 

The memories float away from me as the years pass. 

And, yes from time to time something flashes through my mind but I don’t miss you anymore. 

So I walk away from the things that remind me of the things no longer in my life. 

Sometimes when it’s been one of those days I catch myself thinking about how I miss you. 

But, I know the reason your no longer apart of my life and I’ve accepted that truth a longtime ago. 

The things that I thought were important and would last forever was quickly smashed that night. 

So many pieces that I had to clean up and forget about for today is the present. 

Holding on to too much would drive one crazy and the hole that is barely there would be too big to bear alone. 

I cared about you and I loved you but, the peace in the long run is the fresh air I breath now. 

 

 

Written By: Deirdre Stokes

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In this

place I accepted who I was and what I had become. 

I was broken but yet healed, the past was long gone but the scars felt so fresh some days. 

That it’s hard to move on even when the moments now are good. 

It’s like listening to the same song over and over again even sang by different people the meaning behind the words still haunt you to your core. 

You want to truly express who you are and what you stand for and as you continue to write every day. 

Each piece taking a little bit of you with it and you begin to feel this feeling of pride every time you finish a piece.

But, then hard times come and your words become few and you begin to wonder if what you wrote was any good.

All that you’ve loved is hard to gasp with some much darkness swallowing you up.

And, all you want to do is cry out for help but there is no one who will hear your call.

All that you’ve accepted and loved is lost with you now.

 

Written By: Deirdre Stokes

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850 ways to tell you I care

Three Line Tales, Week 101

tltweek101

photo by Gemma Evans via Unsplash

You’ll find full guidelines on the TLT page – here’s the tl;dr:

  • Write three lines inspired by the photo prompt (& give them a title if possible).
  • Link back to this post (& check the link shows up under the weekly post).
  • Tag your post with 3LineTales (so everyone can find you in the Reader).
  • Read and comment on other TLT participants’ lines.

 

I know that our time together today is not enough time for me to tell you all the 850 ways you have made my life so much better. 

But, I know that I can tell you what’s going on and how I feel and slowly more facts will come and how I feel will follow and soon things will be a little less tense. 

So far I’ve told you 50 things and I hope I have the energy and time to tell you the other 850 reasons you’re a good man and friend too. 

 

Written By: Deirdre Stokes

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850 ways to tell you I care

 

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Can you feel

the feeling of the music pouring all over me and my once tired body

is moving and awake like it hasn’t been interrupted the last couple of days

from the noise of rude neighbors.

Can you feel the world just being so much brighter now than before when all you wanted to do was lay in bed and fall back to sleep and not care if you wasted the whole day away.

You tried so hard to block out the noise and at last it worked but the hours that you had missed out on really took a toll on your body.

But, as the day goes on you have so much more energy than you had before and you feel like you can do so much.

You can feel your life taking back control of the things that are bothering you and you start to do the things you used to do again.

You feel alive and refreshed and hopeful as the music beats to everything going on in your life or things that don’t but you believe and trust it will all workout.

So for a little while you forget all the things that have been bugging you for so long, and you feel lighter when the song is over and the next one is just as strong.

You walk away with a smile on your face and all the things that had pissed you off now don’t seem that big of a deal.

 

Written By: Deirdre Stokes

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Doing what I love to do

100 Word Wednesday: Week 34

100-word-wednesday-week-34

Don Naman Photography 2017

As my fingers pluck the right strings on my favorite guitar and I begin to play and sing for the crowd.

I know that I’m in the right place at the right time and this show is going to be another great night for me.

As I get into the show and I become even more worked up by the energy the crowd is giving me as they sing along to my songs.

I have flashbacks to the moments when the crowd was so small and most of my guest were family and friends and a couple of drunks dancing along in the background.

I know now with a crowd going all way around the corner and that way before the show starts, I just can’t imagine what it looks like when it gets closer to when the doors open.

But, I love what I do and I won’t trade it in for anything in the world.

 

Written By: Deirdre Stokes

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Doing what I love to do!

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Fire

It first starts in my throat and I feel like my breath was just taken from me and then it begins to grow into my stomach until I curled up in so much pain.
That it just doesn’t seem possible for one person to be able to handle all of t his at once without passing out.
I reach out for a bottle of water to quench my thirst to put out the fire in my throat for I’ve seen better days.
I try so hard to feel better so that I can get back to feeling secure in the body that carries me through it all.
I fight for my sanity as my head begins to spin but yet I can’t give up for they are counting on me even though I’m barely holding on myself.
Some how I get through it all just to crash and burn the next day and then back to being okay the next.
There is a war going on inside of my body and I don’t think that I’m winning right now but the battle is not over yet.
I’m not fully myself yet but I’m fighting with all I got to get back to the me  that was strong and dependable no matter what was thrown my way.
 

Written By: Deirdre Stokes

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