I sat there smiling at you like I was so happy to see you.
But behind this mask I wore was the hate and resentment.
You made it seem like I was asking for too much.
It was like I was not being normal and for that you quickly backed away.
Pretending you were still interested but behind your back were you packed bags and every-time I looked away you would throw one out the door.
Until one day you were gone and then I saw you standing there on the platform waiting for the train.
And before I could turn and walk into the crowd, you saw me and you said hey with a smile on your face.
Like you never hurt me, like I didn’t matter.
I thought of making a scene and making you look bad, but in the end I would look sad and not over you.
So I walked over and said hey, how are you?
As a little bit of me died the next couple of minutes as I talked to you.
As I boarded the train and we got separated in the crowd who just wanted to get home.
I let of a breath and the bricks were gone from my shoulders and the tense of having to pretend was over.
And you were gone and my emotions exploded inside of me as I rode the train all the way to the end.
Written By: Deirdre Stokes